Manipulation... A Fine Art

Lately I’ve been thinking about the stats on who is winning the manipulation game, me or the twins. I thought I was ahead since I was able to convince the girls to allow me do their hair each day by letting them pick out of the bucket which hair accessory they wanted to wear that day and I am able to get them in the car for school in the morning in lightning speed with the thought of racing to the car and a cookie as a reward.

But, last night I had to question if they were ahead when they both were crying at 1:30am and I responded to the following requests, "TUCK ME IN MOMMY!”, done……”GET MY LOVEY MOMMY”…..done…...”WAIT..cry, cry”…..”COVER MY FEET MOMMY!”, done…..”MOMMY, GET MY SIPPY CUP”, done….”now, goodnight girls!”…..”WAIT…cry, cry…..” GIVE ME A HUG MOMMY”, done…..” KISS MY CHEEK MOMMY”, done….”now seriously girls go to sleep!”……”WAIT”..cry, cry,… “YOU DIDN’T COVER MY ONE FOOT WITH THE BLANKELY MOMMY”, done……”BUT MOMMY, I NEED A KISS ON MY OTHER CHEEK”, done…..”I love you both but I’m going back to sleep now so good night for realzies this time”.

Once I got back in bed, I found myself lying awake plotting my revenge. I would plan a full on manipulation assault at the breakfast table in the morning by seeing who could finish their entire breakfast before I counted to 20.

I'll keep you posted on the score!

Breaking Bad Habits

I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately to get rid of the pacifiers (binkies) since the girls are almost 2 ½ , they don’t look good in pictures and the girls frequently drop them in the night requesting me to find them which is not a sustainable sleep pattern for me.

We had a party last weekend and I decided to use that time to celebrate a “going away party” for the binkies. I discussed with Emily & Lilly a few days ahead to prepare them for what was coming. At the party we all sang “happy going away to you, happy going away to you, happy going away, little binky, happy going away to you”. Then, since I wasn’t organized enough to purchase balloons that would lift the binkies up and away, I decided the girls could just throw them over the wall in our backyard. Ben and I each held one of the girls as they zinged their little binkies over the wall with a smile.

We went on to have an Easter egg hunt since we were all too sick Easter weekend with the stomach flu to do anything. We had about 10 kids over so it was a lot of fun for the girls. Then I gave each of the kids some different flower seeds in little cups and gave them a little digging tool and set them free in the back yard to plant flowers. They were so excited and so was I thinking about what might pop up in about 4 weeks time. I’ve been doing this planting flowers exercise with the girls for a few weeks now, so I can just imagine the possibility of one day looking out at an English Garden in my own back yard. Won’t that be fun!

The party wound down and the girls were ready for bed. At that point Emily was very upset that I did not have her binky. She said, “Mommy, I need it, I need it” as she cried. I told her binkies were for babies, not big girls like her. She responded with, “I AM A BABY!, I need it!” I felt horrible for her. Can you imagine someone introducing you to cigarettes, and then once you’re addicted, asking you to throw your cigarettes over the wall never to be seen again. I felt awful about not giving in right then and going to get the binky (I went around the fence earlier in the day and scooped them up, not wanting to litter and in case my entire plan failed). I stayed strong and she calmed down after a while and drifted off to sleep.

The next night I went in to check on them before going to bed myself and Lillian was still awake lying in her bed. I heard this little voice squeak out, “mommy?” and I went over close to her to see what she needed and to give her a kiss. She said, “Mommy, I accidentally threw my binky over the wall”. I almost started crying. I explained to her that it was ok and that the binky needed to go back to binkiland in order to help other babies that were just starting out. She said, “I’m a big girl and I don’t need a binky?!” It sounded like a statement and a question at the same time. I brushed her hair back and gave her a kiss; put her ceiling stars light on and said goodnight. Emily woke up at 1 am and refused to leave my side and so we slept in the spare bedroom together. I think I have become the replacement to Emily’s binky, which does not bode well for my restraining order ideas.

I think they are doing well now and binkies are behind us. We've moved on to facination with the toilet. Good stuff!

Bloggers Block

When I first started blogging I had to hold myself back, I wanted to blog every single day but didn’t want anyone to see the obsessive compulsive side of my personality. But now, it has been 5 weeks since I’ve blogged and I’m feeling a bit of “bloggers block” as I like to call it (Ben says that term is not as funny as I think it sounds, again…… I disagree). I actually went in today to enter my blog and I couldn’t remember my password so I had to go through the process of resetting it. But now..... here I am...... trying!

I have given some thought on several topics to blog about, like how Emily wishes I was a kangaroo so she could ride around in my pouch like a joey. Ben says I should file a restraining order against her because he feels it’s getting out of hand. My mom suggested I buy and wear a baby carrier type sling for a 2 year old and see how she likes that, but I don’t think they make them for 30+ lb toddlers. Emily would absolutely love it,my back on the other hand would not, which is why I’m not looking into that one any further.

Another blog topic I thought about was one where I document all the accidents or mistakes Ben and I have made with the girls so far, and what we learned from each of them. But, once I got finished writing down how I almost snipped off the top of Lilly’s finger with the nail clippers and hearing her blood curdling scream or when Ben lost Emily’s grip as she slipped on the bathroom floor and we had to hold her down screaming while she got stitches; I just thought, this is sad and not funny and I definitely don’t want these stories documented in detail in a blog that will be a book for my kids one day.

So, bare with me while I take baby steps here in getting my daily/weekly/monthly blogs worked out…..more fun to come…promise!

The things kids say

Ben takes the girls to school and picks them up every day, since it is only a few blocks from his office. I was so happy with this situation and really relieved that I wouldn't be forced to get out of my pajama’s before noon (we all know that I like working in my slippers).


I was excited about the idea until the girls came home one day and their daddy asked them to tell me what they learned that day. He asked, “what does a cow say?” and they replied, “mooooo”, and then he asked, “what does a duck say?” and they replied qwack qwack”, and then he asked, “what does a mommy say?”, and they replied “Stop it! Stop it! with their little fingers pointing in my face, and then he asked, “what does a daddy say?”, and they replied “Good girl, Good girl”, with a smile.

I was no longer thrilled that he was spending 30 min of uninterrupted alone time with them each day, and could only imagine at this point what they would come home saying.

Well, a few of the things they come home talking about are: Big Ole Trucks, Baby Backhoes, Parking Garages and Cranes. Emily likes to say “Arrggg, I have the scurvies” in honor of Gasparilla. Lilly came home the other day and said, “Bless your heart, mommy”. I wonder who taught her that!?

I was rocking Emily in the living room recliner last night since she is not feeling well (double ear infection), and she pointed up to my Salvador Dali painting and said, “is that you, mommy?” I immediately said, “No, that is not mommy!” to which she responded, “YES, that is you mommy!”

And...........Ben strikes again!

The Zoo

We have decided to start venturing out more with the girls on the weekends this year. We signed up for an annual pass to the Zoo, which I actually won at my company picnic last year. The picnic raffle is a funny story, so I’ll share it. We arrived several hours late to my company picnic at the Zoo last summer, and as a result, they told us we had to take our raffle ticket directly to the front of the room to get it in the raffle bucket since they already started giving away prizes. There were about 200 Accenture employees and family members there and all were eagerly awaiting the final drawing for the “Grand Prize”, the Annual Family Pass to the Zoo.

So, Ben drops our ticket in the bucket and it’s quickly mixed up into the bunch and names continue to be called for t-shirts, movie passes, etc. I think they were giving out prizes for about 1 hour before we arrived and folks were ready to leave and tour the zoo but you had to be present to win, so they waited and waited and waited. Finally, (10 min after we arrived), they pulled the raffle ticket for the final grand prize drawing and announced “the Kniesly Family”. YES!! Now, that is what I call being Fashionably Late!!

So, we cashed in our certificate and now have a Family pass to the zoo, this includes Alex who is now only 17 and is my step-daughter (not my step-sister any longer). How did that happen, you ask? Or, as Ben asked, “you actually think they will believe I have a 17 year old daughter? Why wouldn’t you just say she was your daughter?, You look older than me!”, (which I personally disagree with by the way). Well, let me explain.

I was at the counter signing up the family when she asked for the kids names and ages. We wanted to include Alex since she is visiting us soon and the zoo is on the itinerary while she is here. I quickly rattled off Lillian 2, Emily 2 and Alex 17, at which point, she asked for birthdates. I freaked a little bit and I could feel my armpits starting to itch (that’s what happens to me when I get really, really nervous). I quickly told her the twins birth-date and then while she was writing that down, my mind was racing to attempt to figure out what 2010 – 17 was….. armpits continuing to itch.

She looked up at me and I had nothing but a blank look, I said…”um, um, 1985?!”, to which she quickly responded, “oh she is too old for this then, you have to be under 18”, so I said, “well, let’s see.…I should know this but …..she’s not really my daughter…she’s my step-daughter and I’m horrible with this stuff.” And then I turned around to yell across the way to Ben, “hey babe, what year was Alex born again?”, when the man standing behind me and wanting things to move along so he could get his annual pass blurted out, “1993”. So, that is how Alex ended up being my 17 year old step-daughter (Alex, please don’t think that means we will be buying you school clothes or sending you to college, a free pass to the Zoo and that experience I went through to get it, should be enough).

Now, after writing all of this down, I can clearly see that I lied and this is a blog that will be turned into a book for the girls to show proof that we love them (and that we too lied at one time or another). Great!?

Once in the gates we had a wonderful time, feeding the stingrays, looking at the manatees and turtles, listening to a story about penguins, lovin the lama, petting goats, riding the choo-choo train and playing in the kids hut. Can’t wait to go again!

Cats and Dogs

Right after I had the girls, a friend of mine explained to me that whatever their personalities were at birth, would stay the same throughout their lives. I must admit, I didn’t really believe it since I imagined that you learn to act a certain way for the most part. Seeing the differences in Emily and Lillian’s personalities is just amazing and they seem to complement each other well, like the yin and the yang.

From the time they were 1 week old, we could clearly see that Emily was more like a puppy dog and Lilly was more like a kitty cat.

Emily wakes up in the morning with a smile on her face, interested in everything around her, needing to go here and there and everywhere. Wherever you are is where Emi wants to be and if you can pat her back, hold her hand, rub her foot or kiss her in the process, all the better.

Lillian, on the other hand, wakes up in the morning, (earlier than she would like to thanks to Emi), likes to stretch and then wants to sit quietly and watch tv or read a book while she nibbles on some banana and a sippy cup. When Lilly was a tiny baby she would stretch in the morning for at least 5 min or more.

Emily is in your face all the time, interested in everything you have to tell her about life and would love to be physically connected to you if she could make that happen. She requires a lot of one-on-one attention but she will reward you with her intelligence and perhaps a lick on the leg (she does this regularly and it worries us a bit).

Lilly can play with a piece of hair she finds on the carpet (although she would rather a fresh one she plucks from your head), for at least 30 min or more. If you give her yarn, all the better! She is even learning to hsss like a cat.

She loves to go off and do things on her own, in fact, one time we lost her in the house for about 15 min and almost gave Ben, Alex and I a heart attack. We finally found her shut in the food pantry closet playing with onions and stacking cans of tuna (hhhmmmm).

As you can see, the personality traits of these girls really are similar to cats and dogs. Emi can’t help but love you and Lilly will make up her mind about you once she is ready! They are alike in many ways though too. For example, both of them have jumped out of the tub only to go run and pee on the carpet and they can both tear a room apart if left alone within a few minutes.

Morning Routine

Our mornings are so routine that I feel like I can account for every minute between 7-8am, and even though it is only 60 minutes, I am literally exhausted by the end of that hour. I really wish I was a morning person! The girls wake up at 7am, well, I should say that Emily wakes up at 7 and then she climbs in bed with Lilly. She pokes and prods at Lilly long enough to carefully wake her without Lilly knowing what she is doing. Emily is a morning person, Lilly is not.

By 7:10am we usually hear lots of giggling going on and once Ben/daddy cracks their door open, I know my comfy cozy peaceful rest is about to end, like a warm blanket being ripped off on a cold morning. My mornings usually start off with, “no, please don’t touch that”, “don’t go in there”, “come on, get out of the toilet”, “can you go downstairs and see daddy?”, “daddy has nanna for you”, “get out of there”, “it’s my chapstick”, “no, it’s MY chapstick”, “oh, please don’t ….DO THAT!”.

Finally, when I get really desperate and I just want 5 more min of sleep because I think it will make all the difference in my day, I say, “go downstairs and see Dora and Boots on TV and daddy has a nanna for you and a sippy cup, go, go see”(in a very encouraging voice)……. “Be careful on the stairs”. This only works 50% of the time and really only allows me about 5 more minutes of sleep. The fact that I try for this every day tells me that I’m not a morning person and I’m not learning to be one, as most said I would once I had children.

The next 45 min is about taking the girls back and forth to the potty, where they are more interested in playing with toilet paper, flushing, flushing, flushing and washing hands with soap as many times as possible before I nudge them out of that room. I am surprised at how resilient our toilets are, we have only called the plumber once so far.

And the dance continues as we sit down to eat the wonderful breakfast daddy made and the conversation includes: “Emily eat your eggs”, “no, I don’t want them,” “ok, I will give them to Lilly”, “NO, MY EGGS!!”, “gobble, gobble, gobble”, “eeewww Bluebabies”, “Do you like bluebabies Lilly?”, “YES!, where’s my veatamen?”, “I think it’s under your bagel”, “It’s under my bagel?”, “hee hee, it was hiding under my bagel”, “down, Down, DOWN!”, “you want down?”, “AYUDAME!, AYUDAME!”, “Dora is really helping you learn your Spanish isn’t she?, here, let me help you down”.

Are you at all tired from reading this yet? Next phase is getting dressed, where I always ask who’s first and Emi quickly replies, “Lilly’s first”. I think this is the only time Emily approves of Lilly going first. Sometimes getting dressed involves me chasing them or playing manipulative games in order to get the clothes, socks and shoes all on. If I’m lucky I can get a bow or hair clip in, if I ask really nicely and they are in great moods. If not, bed head it is and I really don’t care what the teachers or anyone else thinks!



We load them up in our luxury living room on wheels, (as I like to call it), and off to school with daddy they go as I stand in the garage waving and smiling a really big smile (and I think you know why I’m smiling). I then walk inside and mutter, “wow”, “just….WOW”, and then I go to work (did I say, “go to work”?). Just then it hits me, I am grateful for my job!